Why do you think we hold Shotsuki services or any Buddhist memorial service? Are we doing these services for the benefit of deceased people?
No. We hold memorial services to express our appreciation for the people who have passed away, and we hold these services to receive lessons from them.
Therefore, we hold these services for our own benefit, not for the benefit of deceased people. Remembering and honoring people who have died are things we do for ourselves, not for them. For example, if you hold a memorial service for your mother, the service reminds you that your mother wished for your happiness.
Our temple’s name is Hongan-ji, which means true wish temple. Not only your mother, but there are countless numbers of mothers in this world and in history who wished that their children would be liberated from suffering. Not only the mothers, not only the fathers, not only family and friends think this way, but all human beings want to be liberated from suffering. And they also wish for others to be liberated. This is the meaning of Hongan, true wish.
One woman asked me to conduct a memorial service for her parents. She said to me, “Please chant so that my parents can go to the Pure Land so that they can rest peacefully.”
I told her, “You don’t have to worry about them. They are already in the Pure Land, where they have become Buddhas to you. Buddha means teacher, so you can still listen to them and learn from them. They may not be here in this world anymore and you cannot see them with your eyes physically, but if you remember them, you can meet them many times. Remember how they loved you, how they smiled at you, how they enjoyed being with you.
Your parents loved you. Being loved by somebody is a necessary experience in life. Your life is not only yours. Your life also belongs to the people who love you.
Last March, I had to plan a ministers’ retreat in Los Angeles, so I invited Rev. Hideo Okamoto to be the speaker. He is from Shimane prefecture in Japan. To be honest with you, it wasn’t my idea to invite him. A temple member had asked him to come.
Rev. Okamoto came to Los Angeles and he paid for the airfare and lodging by himself. We only paid a small honorarium “orei” for his lecture. I wanted to know what motivated him to pay his own way in order to come the America to talk about Buddhism.
Since I worked in the North America District Office in LA, I often had the opportunity to meet and talk to the lecturers. For our seminar, I asked Rev. Okamoto to speak about the people who influenced his Buddhist path. He spoke about his Buddhist teacher, his grandmother and his mother. I was impressed by all of his stories. I would like to tell you a little about his mother’s story.
Rev. Okamoto’s mother was not an enthusiastic Nembutsu follower. He thought about what made her happy and what kinds of situations she likes to be in. He realized that when she helped somebody, or when she did something for someone else, and if that person smiled at her, then she felt great pleasure.
For example, she was happy cooking food and giving it to others, especially if they appreciated it and told her, “This is delicious.” She was happy if she could help someone else be happy. I thought maybe this was the reason why Rev. Okamoto came to the US to talk to us. If we could enjoy his talk, and if he saw us enjoying the lecture, then he would be happy.
We are here now living, thinking about all the people who came before us. Please think of them as Buddhas. They are Buddhas who would be happy seeing us living our lives as fully as we can. This is the wish of a Buddha. This is Hongan. Sometimes we may feel alone in life, but through these Buddhist services, we are reminded that we are not alone. We are together with countless Buddhas.